Crispin Porter There has never been an advertising firm that fellates itself more than the rich, hipster pussies at Crispin Porter + Bogusky. Before these scared-to-live 20something bitches started slaving for this advertising creative agency and sucking each other off to Palm’s Directors Label series, a lot of them were deejays at the University of Miami’s radio station WVUM. You’d walk into the office to grab promos and get wafted in the face with several man-child assortments of smelly soy juices and tofu spreads while stumbling over dog-eared copies of Fast Food Nation. Now they’re behind those homoerotic ads for Burger King (which is also based in Miami, jus' sayin’), and get all tipsy and proud about their “latest client” at Churchill’s Pub. By the way, we don’t hate Whoppers, Ikea or Eric Schlosser. The sad thing is they can’t do shit in retaliation except fill a house with popcorn like that ‘80s movie or feather us in Daddy’s Money. Dumbasses.   Next